One candidate and two total idiots announce plans to run for Eureka City Council

We’re starting to think we should take back everything we’ve ever said about Linda Atkins. Even though we still really believe all of it, the two alternatives that are shaping up to take her place when she vacates her 2nd district seat couldn’t be any worse.

The Times-Standard recently covered the three folks who’ve announced their intent to run, one being Jon Fullerton in the 4th Ward and Matthew Owen and “Liberal” Jon Yalcinkaya in the 2nd.

eurekarunnersWe’ll start by saying that we don’t know shit about Jon Fullerton, but power to him, he has a cool mustache, and he’s probably a nicer person than Ciarabellini. (Anonymity has never felt so good – you know her first phone call after reading this will be to her enforcers.)

On the other hand, you’ve got a couple of candidates that are just complete disasters and wackos. (We know, pot, kettle, calling it black, we get it.)

We’ve written about both candidates before, for a various reasons, and we encourage you to revisit those posts:

Matthew Owen

Guess which County Supervisor’s spouse rubs elbows with the cannabis elite?

Don’t go in the water: Humboldt’s own political shark

Although, to be honest, we have no idea why we referred to lil’ Matty as a shark. Guess we were trying to work through some stuff. Here’s a better comparison:

blobfish

As for Jon Yalcinkaya:

Linda Atkins’ heir apparent – Liberal Jon?

Ha! Just thinking back on all the crazy shit this guy says on THC is enough to comfort us, and helps us realize he could never win an election.

Except, perhaps, against an idiot like Owen. Well played and well timed, Liberal Jon. Well played.

In any case, here’s some folks we’d endorse over the both of ’em:

Game of Thrones - Series 02.Episode 10 "Valar Morghulis".Jack Gleeson as Joffrey Baratheon..?Copyright 2000-2005 Home Box Office Inc.

cow headLast, and certainly the strongest of any candidates we’ve discussed today, we bring you Duke. A pooch with experience and pizzazz – and definitely more brain power than Yalcinkaya and Matt Owen combined.

mayor dog

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17 Responses to One candidate and two total idiots announce plans to run for Eureka City Council

  1. Just Watchin says:

    jonboy is actually a little goofier looking than I had imagined, and that’s saying something.

    Like

  2. O. Driftwood says:

    One candidate and a female idiot, criminal and liar running for president.

    Like

  3. MOLA42 says:

    You honestly don’t know who John Fullerton is?

    Remember the Anti-Measure R (Eureka Minimum Wage) campaign? Remember the wholesale lies? Remember his scaring the poop out of the electorate with tales of economic dystopia (a la Mad Max)? Remember his making promises to push for his own version of a “fair” minimum wage measure as a substitute only to say, Shucks guys, I didn’t really mean it?

    Your memory is selective at best. I’ll take Middle Matt over John Fullerton any day and I imagine you know how I feel about Mr. Owen.

    Like

  4. jmms says:

    Melinda IS nice and has a ton of common sense.

    Like

    • Fools Rush In says:

      Melinda may be nice but there is no one more responsible for dysfunction in Eureka.

      Like

      • Henchman Of Justice says:

        So, before Melinda, Eureka was an island-esque paradise………no desires for a Mike’s hard lemonade, gimme a dancing bobblehead w/ margarita mas bonita and some mexicali chips con salsa mas caliente.

        Like

  5. Fed Up and Packing it In says:

    Time to move. If this is the best we can do I’d rather live elsewhere. Seriously, I’m closing my business and moving to Oregon. I’ve tried to make a living here for ten years but the bureaucracy has finally won. I keep hoping new officials will make a difference but nothing ever changes. Slash 4 more jobs from the Eureka employment base.

    Like

    • Henchman Of Justice says:

      The problem reads to be your very neighbors, business associates, voters and others who create the environment that forces you to relocate.

      You are not to be blamed, many high school graduates already know of what you convey because life is so………transparent and the bullshit is suffocatingly deeper than an abyss.

      More jobs lost, sigh……..oh well, at least there is DHHS to save the community….burp.

      Like

  6. Tad says:

    How much makeup is lil Matty wearing in at photo?!?

    Like

    • Let's Do Better says:

      Good catch! It does seem a little heavy on the eyeliner for daytime. Leads one to wonder about role playing at the Virginia Bass Owen residence. Everything I’ve heard about Owen screams run away as fast as possible. We’ve got to be able to better than this.

      Like

  7. Just Watchin says:

    Looks like yalcinkaya has found his campaign strategy. Troll the blogs under different names and take potshots at his opponent.

    Like

    • Help! says:

      Jon Boy is a nut but still better than Owen. Won’t someone, anyone with a semblance of a brain please run!

      Like

      • Henchman Of Justice says:

        Kudos to him for getting involved in a mess, but unfortunately, the real nuts are the voters, so unless any candidate can out-nut the voters at nuttiness, chances are a simpleton nut will lose.

        Like

    • Henchman Of Justice says:

      What’s up Doc?

      Dagnabbit Rabbit.

      How’s business going chiropractically?

      Like

  8. Just Watchin says:

    Anyone else notice that looney man on bike isn’t even using his own blog as a campaign tool to get his views out. I’m bettin that he drops out before it even gets started.

    Like

    • Just Watchin says:

      You heard it here first! Jonboy just posted on his blog that he has dropped out. It really wasn’t that hard to predict….

      Like

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